sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
