If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Randomize
