Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Randomize
