so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
Randomize
