There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
Randomize
