im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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