I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
