that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Randomize
