you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize
