Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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