Swine flu. Run for my life!
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
