i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
and she was petting her beer can
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
