SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
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