There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize
