Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Randomize
