Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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