so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
