at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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