Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
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