I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
It's just like the Real World with babies
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
Randomize
