the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
