if you like me you must not know who I am
Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
