Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize
