I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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