I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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