I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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