no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Randomize
