you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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