What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
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