He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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