I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
I want her autograph on my taint
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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