Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
It's just like the Real World with babies
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize