If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
