i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
Randomize
