I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
