Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize
