I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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