I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
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