bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
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