He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Also, beer. Big fan.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
Randomize
