Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
