idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Randomize
