I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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