I'm eating all of the evidence.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
