you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
he thought i was a dude.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
Randomize
