They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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