she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
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