Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
