if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
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