You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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