I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Randomize
