That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
